'i am struggling with an addiction'

A large percentage of the world's 'addiction' population have uttered these words in their thoughts.Yet, a bare minimum are able to convert these same words into verbal proclamation.

Psychology has it that self-proclamation of realized weakness is the very beginning of healing.

Once you are able to say these words, it registers in your whole being, not just in thought, that you have got a problem.And believe it or not, no matter how nerve-wrecking the realization of an addiction is, its benefits are worth it.So until your will power is strong enough to declare the existence of something you are battling with, you will remain in a bubble.A bubble that is doomed to burst but insists on holding on to more and more air.You remain a dreamer walking down a plank placed on the edge of a ship,knowing what is inevitable , but refuses to wake up.

You will make endless excuses unto why you may be addicted to whatever substance, person or  situation.

You will seek advice and you will talk to the best of shrinks.

But, even they know that help is never help until it is wanted.So help yourself and those that care for you.Be true to you.Be true to the person you have become.

It is how healing starts.

#inspired#

Live your life..

yes their world may look classy and catchy

..and their clothes tainted with colour so flashy

the smiles and poses may look perfect..almost atleast

but what the truth is ..is that it is all a movie..they are but a cast

live your life..make your own movie

oogle you may at her skirt..so short

and try you may to fit in their lot

dance in a fantasy so damned to ever be just that

but ..what or who you are meant to be..

and your real life is acting out on its own ..without you

when you finally catch on..to their fast life

and realise that roses are not always so red

..a life..a meaningful rich life that was meant for you..

will have been wasted chasing after a mere perception of a better life..not meant for you

live your life..direct your own movie

Add caption

pipi apiyo

my bus ride to work

so..my bus ride to work..

today i had to run for the bus ..literarlly...because silly me decided to wear those 5 inch heels i dread.Something in me warned me not to but the lady i am convinced me that i was a pro at walking in heels and that the pain and blisters that accompanied them would go away after a day or two.

Back to my bus ride..the tout waited for me to catch up(what an angel) but as soon as my feet touched the bus floor, the driven stepped onto the pedal and the heels(again) the sudden movement..so yea..i toppled forward and almost fell on some lady that was fast enough to give me one of those evil eyes..cannot tell thaugh, if it was because i almost messed up her ridiculous hair-do or because i carried with me a better bag..and had on better make-up..or ..hehe..was wearing awesome heels!!(yes..i said awesome heels).Call it the everlasting well hidden female envy...every girl has it.

Which got me thinking:why is it that we  ladies always have it for those dressed or looking better than ourselves?You may tell yourself that you do not get jealous but the sad and bare reality is that it is in our genes.The only difference is the level of 'envy' and to what extent you are willing to go to outshine your counterpart.

I talked to some of my friends and my 'theory' was apparently something that has existed for as long as before our birth.From centuries in memorial, women have spent hours and hours in make-up, and dressing rooms with  a specific 'someone to outdo' in mind.And, the most shocking thing is that, this 'someone' is more often than not a close friend,sister, mother-in-law, workmate and in very rare occasions, T.V personalities.

The renowned philosopher ,Freud, gave us an interesting review,and i quote: 

Sigmund Freud 

"The great question that has never been answered, and which I have not yet been able to answer, despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul, is 'What does a woman want?"

I hate to ask this question but  i am obliged to..can't we ladies/women be comfortable with ourselves?With who we are?What we have?And the answer is a simple..no.

Pipi Apiyo. 

should i

i know i shouldn't

i know 'us' is a dream

i know what they say about you

i know what YOU say about YOU

i know that you know that i shouldn't

Yet i want to

i want it  so bad my thinking hurts

my heart and my brain are in constant argument

the former says 'take a risk'

the latter  argues 'don't even think about it'

and you argue, with a smile, 'listen to your heart'

amidst this chaos, all i can see is the dimple on your cheek

all i can hear is the soft wind in your voice

all i can feel

is the ripple that your touch sends down my spine

but still,should i?